Friday, October 16, 2009


and now, sex is an issue.
we all go through that milestone in our lives when our peers start "doing it". this is then followed by that nasty feeling of obligation which is set upon you to do the same. some of us give in to that feeling, whether it's to be classified as "cool" or if, you know, it just feels "right". yet some of us, set up a wall that just keeps us cruising on the v's. once you passed the petty, little comments of being "fridgid", not having sex was often saluted. it was rare for someone who was still a virgin, to be faced with problems from others around them. however, thinking back over that period of time though, it never occured to us as kids, that an issue would emerge from the choice you made to build that certain wall infront of you.
to everyone else, it isn't necessarily a bad thing to be on the countdown to the end of your education, and still being a virgin. but for those who are actually living it, it's not only increasingly embarrassing, but it's a bit of a nuisance when it comes to meeting men. as we get older, we are attracted to older guys. and it's highly doubtful you will come across one who lacks the experience you do. not to mention, it's highly doubtful you will come across one who doesn't see virginity as a flaw. having said this, the minority of men who don't mind the i've-never-had-sex-before thing, still subconsciously makes us feel uncomfortable. these men would not pressure the inexperienced into anything, however, the virgin would simply feel not good enough to fulfil both the wants and needs of that man. so does this mean, that eighteen-year-old virgins simply built that wall to big? does this mean they waited a little too long?
it's funny to think back to when we were barely teenagers, and the common statement was, i'm going to wait til im sixteen. it's funny to think back to when it seemed like we all had the same thing programmed into our mind. that being, once we turn sixteen, we are given a line-up, we pick the ideal boyfriend, then have sex with him after two months. but the funniest thing is, it hardly ever turned out like that. for some, yes. they got boyfriends, and had sex. for others, they got drunk at parties and had sex with a guy who was four years older. for a few, sex wasn't even a thought that crossed their mind. however for the rest - the unfortunate - we got boyfriends, but broke up after three weeks. therefore, no sex. we got drunk, and got into a bed with a seventeen-year-old, before realising what an idiot you were and then got out. therefore, no sex.
for us sex was not an option, but that wasn't by choice. so, was it merely just sprinkle of bad luck? if that is the case, was building a wall against sex just a factor of being in denial?
whatever the reason, those who have not had sex are still left in a state of know, they say your first time should be when you're ready and feel comfortable. but it's not possible to be ready or comfortable with those who accidently make you feel strange about it.
is it?

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