Monday, December 28, 2009

friends.

remember the primary school days when you thought the friends you had then, would be the only friends you would ever have? and the enemies you had, would hate you forever? funny how once you hit high school, you also get hit with the reality that the world is full of more people than you think. normally, a friend can be described as a companion, another person you share interests with or (according to sources) a person who is attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard. however, there are so many different kinds of friends one can have, a dictionary definition of the word barely applies anymore.
in high school, many people have the same system of classification, in regards to who their friends are.
firstly, most people have a best friend, or more commonly known as a BFF. you know, that one "main" friend who knows all the secrets and who would never betray you.
secondly, they have that circle of friends, commonly known as "the girls" or "the boys". these are the ones who you sit with at lunch, or party with on the weekends. they know a fair few of your secrets and the latest on who you are dating.
thirdly, there are the individual friends. those being the ones who you sit with in class, and go hang out with when your circle gets annoying.
fourthly, there are the acquaintances. those being the people you're not really friends with, but who you say hey to three or four times a day.
finally, there are those "other friends" that you aren't really a fan of, but talk to anyway.
these catergories are rarely declared, however they do exist. they exist right until the morning after graduation. it is at this moment, the fences between the different types of friends one has and the fences between the stereotyped groups seem to magically apparate (like harry potter characters), thus the meddling of everyone begins.
whether it takes six days or six months, you're friends from highschool will only be your friends for as long as you keep them in your life. of course it's hard when people move away for work, or uni, or to travel. but if you want that best friend to be the one you turn to once you've cheated on your husband of five years, then you have to push through and make it happen.
you wouldn't think it would be that hard to keep in touch with people, especially with the many ways of communication. calling. texting. email. myspace. twitter. facebook. you could even go vintage-style and write you're old goon-buddy a letter! either way, if two people want to keep a connection, they will.
some people however still struggle to keep certain friends in their lives. their excuse of "being busy", is quite pathetic really, and it is generally code for "since-i-don't-have-english,-maths-and-art-with-you-i-realise-you're-not-that-interesting". being on the receiving end of this situation, (that is, thinking you had a good connection with someone but then realising they never want to catch up) can be hard to adjust to as you are used to seeing them everyday. but really, if they don't want to be you're friend, clearly you deserve better than that. realistically, you can't go forcing something that is destined to end and if this happens to be the case, go mingle with new crowds when you hit the clubs. go on randoming adding sprees on facebook. and even with the friendship-group fences gone, (where the highschool rules don't apply) go be friends with that girl who hooked up with your acquaintances boyfriend if you want to. it shouldn't matter who you are friends with, as long as they make you happy.
high school traps people into believing your friends are based on, or can determine, your status. the real world teaches people that personal status means nothing compared to happiness. humans are social beings. so whether it be old friends, new friends, life-long friends or just temporary friends, we all need them. so just make it happen.